Ray spent his nights and weekends teaching his six children how to cook, clean and grocery shop. When they grew up, they became independent adults who didn't rely on others to mow their lawn or cook healthy meals.
Unfortunately, Ray's ten grandchildren are not learning these important life skills. Their parents are so busy driving from one activity to another, making dinner and catching up after a long day of work, they can't seem to fit chores into their daily lives.
The Importance of Doing Chores at an Early Age
It is common knowledge that chores are an important part of growing up. Not only do chores teach responsibility, but they are also a great way to teach time management to children who are involved in many things.
In a March 2003 article in Minnesota Parent, Liz Wolf reviews a recent study completed by Marty Rossman of the University of Minnesota. Rossman examined data that had been collected over 25 years and found that the best predictor of young adult success was beginning chores at around three years of age. In fact, being involved in chores was a better predictor than IQ and motivation.
Parents who waited until their children were older found that the children felt resentful of the chores, as if the parents gave them the chore because they didn't want to do it themselves. Giving responsibilities at a younger age instills the belief that "we are all in this together."
Guidelines for Starting Duties at Home
With all the rushing everyday, parents feel they do not have time to teach and follow through with chores. But these tasks do not need to be overwhelming and time consuming. Some chores, like bringing down laundry, only takes an extra minute of the day. Others, like cleaning a bathroom, can be broken into doable bits and done during a predetermined time of day.
The following are some guidelines for any age:
- Give the child specific directions.
- Assist the child.
- Give lots of praise during and after chore duty.
- Create a specific time so that it becomes part of the daily schedule.
- Make chores daily.
- Focus on a few jobs until the skill has been mastered.
It is important to remember that the child is learning a new skill. At first, it is not the finished product that counts as much as the effort that is put forth. For example, when teaching a child how to vacuum (often a chore kids can't wait to learn), expect him to move the vacuum around haphazardly. What is important is the accomplishment he feels for trying. As the child continues to practice and improve, the parent can then teach the child how to be more thorough.
Suggested Jobs for Beginners
Children love to help around the house. Try some of these chores to create positive first experiences:
- Cleaning anything that requires a spray bottle (fill an empty bottle with water)
- Vacuuming
Provide the child with chores that have results that are easily seen. Children can feel a sense of accomplishment with these types of chores.
- Making meals or snacks
- Gardening
Making Time for Household Tasks
School aged children have a lot to do. Most days, parents do all they can to fit in school, homework, and extra-curricular activities. Chores do not need to be time consuming. Wiping stair banisters or putting dishes in the dishwasher are tasks that can be completed in a few minutes time.
Here some suggestions for fitting in chore time:
- Pick a time of day to do the chore. Choosing a specific time of day helps the whole family remember to do the job.
- Have specific jobs that the child is always responsible for such as clearing the table. Having daily jobs helps with time management.
- Break larger tasks down. This will encourage everyone to follow through. For example, parents can assign just toilets. Sinks can be done the next day.
Following Through With Chores
According to Rossman's research, chores are an important part of growing up. Chores do more than teach a child how to clean. They teach him that he is an important part of the family and that everyone needs to work together for the family to be successful.
Making time for household tasks as part of the daily routine is a key point. Keeping them simple and rewarding is also a must for children who are just beginning. Children who are not only taught what to do, but are praised for their effort will eventually be a big help around the house. Parents need to create a job list and stick to it. Without continuity and daily follow through chores will quickly be forgotten. Parents who stick to the guidelines for duties will discover it's only a matter of time before the child can complete numerous tasks on his own successfully.
MaryBeth Calvin - A long, long time ago, I received my bachelor's degree at Clemson University as a special education teacher and then my Masters in ...
